Scattered

 "Scattered" is the word a family member used to describe a mindset and lifestyle and it resonated with me immediately.  Lately there has been a lot going  in this transition.  There has been a lot of  thinking, and even some scattered attempts at planning.  But still, I am all over the place in this transition.  I am scattered.  But  I am not believing this is a permanent condition.  I don't think God will leave me like this.  

But I long for those days of un-scattered laser focus, ignoring competing sounds, noise, and influence   As scripture says, "Laying aside every weight and the sin which doeth so easily beset us, and let us run the race that is set before us."  I guess there is some "laying aside" to be done before laser focus takes over.  I have to give up.

Give up what? Give up the ordinary comforts in body, mind, and sprit that often lulls a person asleep to the life God has "set before us?"  Comfort just may the greatest danger to whatever calling God may have placed upon me.  Comfort is such a seduction as are comfort foods. Both can lead one down a dreamy path going no where  to a life scattered in its focus.  

And giving up can also mean sacrifice.  What am I willing to surrender to fulfill God's calling upon my life.  How much can I "deny myself" and "pick up my cross" -whatever that may be - and follow Jesus.  So, to get myself together I need to find my cross and do some cross carrying with Jesus.  No doubt that will lead to  being  able to "run that race that is set before us," and to have a life un-scattered..