Friday, October 1, 2010

Scared in a Good Way

My main event is just a little over a month away. It scares me; scares me in good way I suppose. Just thinking about it heightens my senses. I catch my breath. So great to be caught up in this, to have a goal, a passion this deep.

It will hurt at some point and I catch myself wondering how I will stand in against that time. I have been there before many times and in the end found myself smiling. Still there is an element of fear; a tidbit of doubt, and I am glad this still does this to me.

The training is down to a few weeks. Soon it will be over and I will miss it. Over the months it has been a friend that daily, has shown me direction and discipline. Am I really ready for that friend to leave? However, there are so many projects that have been waiting on me: projects I have put off until "after this is over." Now I consider: do I really want it to be over?

Yes, there will probably be a period of ordinary activities with lesser time for swun/bike/run. But my guess is, that time will be short. Even at this age, I am essentially a child with a short attention span for what does not scare me a little or makes me catch my breath.