#22 Miles of the Journey Through the Rapids of Cancer- The Event of Eternity

 The end of another week.  I am not going to church because the flu has been on the rise lately.  There is enough risk sitting for a couple of hours in the infusion room for my treatment with a bunch of sick people. Tuesday will be my next treatment day.  

I feel ok, not great, but not bad at all.  However, I seem to be losing weight.  We are not sure if it is the drugs or my diet, or a combo of both.  My diet has certainly become protein-centric.  My training hours have increased, so this could be part of the issue.  Funny, but the weight I am at now is the weight I wanted to get to in my long-ago ironman training. 

Sleep was fairly good last night.  I had one of those recurring dreams from long, long ago, about me trying to get to the start of my ironman.  In all the former dreams, I never made it, and I usually found myself lost somewhere in the city, noticing the time and realizing the ironman had started without me.  So it was with last night's dream.  I missed the start.  In that dream and the others before, I didn't get a lot of support or help to get to the starting line.  No one seemed to know what was going on and how important it was to me.  The people were nameless, faceless souls, embroiled in their own here and now, oblivious to me and others.

Sometimes I think that the devil makes me have these dreams to shame me, to disappoint me all over again about myself and the ironman, to skew my perception of others as uncaring.  But I am not going to believe the dream.  There is an ironman start for which I am already registered.  My name is written in the Lamb's Book of Life.  And I won't get lost on the way to the start, because Jesus will be taking me there.  "There will be no more night."  There will be no more pain or disappointment.  I will begin the event of eternity with Jesus.

After all that I lived through lately, I know I was left here for some reason or some task yet to do.  Although I am not sure what that is (perhaps writing this blog).  But sometimes I think that I can't wait for my ironman with Jesus to begin.