It is piling up on me; the miles and hours on the indoor bike, the abysmal weather limited outdoor training, a hundred year old mother who has needed attention and pervaded my thoughts, the grandchildren and the constant temptation of candy and chips laid temptingly everywhere. On top of that - if I can admit it - I think I am afraid. Motivation to do this thing at all has ebbed and flowed. What can I say but the journey just got real; the course got rocky, and I got beaten down to an extent. Looking at all this through a vision and will that was clouded with fatigue and concern, I just wanted to go out the back door of this whole journey, slip off the course to a rest station and stay there for a long time.
Monday morning the sun is out. Sleep was good. And in the arm wrestling match with all that would weaken my resolve and end my journey, I can feel my strength pushing my hand and arm up again, in spite of the strong resistance. Yeah, I think I am back to even again; ready to put in another hard week on the journey. Through the smoke and haze of what I have been through I find that, indeed, I want to finish this journey. I want to "fight the good fight," even if I can't finish the race in time.....I promised God I would try.
I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. II Tim 4:7
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