It is getting so close it is scary. I feel so unprepared but as I look back at my records I have laid down a lot of miles biking and running. And, I have been doggedly consistent. My goodness, I have been solid on this journey, now into its 30th week. Before that, I was no slouch with training consistency either. The records show this.
So what am I scared of so much? Sure, my long bikes have not materialized. The longest bike is 75 miles. But is that really enough to ignore the journey I have been on? Perhaps it is that I have invested myself into this effort so much that I fear it all come to nothing yet again. Perhaps, I would rather just walk away than to let all that effort and consistency come to nothing. I just don't want to take the chance. There it is. I am afraid of using and losing what I have built. There is such a history of failure for me with ironman efforts and I just can't seem to put that down to run the race set before me like God has asked me to.
So, tonight in my prayers I will ask for the courage to face forward the task set before me and let God control the outcome and receive the glory.
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