The doldrums: "a state or period of inactivity, stagnation, or depression." I was there. Nobody knew. I went three days without any training for the first time in several years. I prayed. The doldrums continued. I became more concerned about my motivation to endure than my physical ability to do so. Oh sure, it is hot, humid, and lots going on with regular life. There was lots to take my focus away but I have faced those demons before and gotten back up and gone on. This time was really tough. I didn't share this with anyone except God. Who else could help?
Then one day without provocation, an old friend sent me a message of hope and inspiration; a reminder that God is in this and God is with me. I am not really sure what or how he might have known about my ironman training, but it was obvious from the message that he had been watching me and my journey, perhaps for hope and inspiration of his own.
A day or so later my daughter wrote that she had been running and had gotten up to four miles. Shortly thereafter, my son asked me when ironman training would officially begin. A relative who had just got through open heart surgery wanted to know all about my training and racing plans. He seemed inspired by it all. Then he remarked about some detail from a story from a book I have written. I was surprised that someone had read my little book and more surprised that someone could remember something from it. Somebody has been watching me. I guess I had thought I had been doing all this in a dark closet. I had been watched all along. I was convicted and a little bit ashamed.
God has granted me health and vitality beyond normal years. May I use those gifts to provide hope and inspiration, to show God in human effort and commitment. God has sent others to lift me up out of my doldrums. So, I sense He sends me to "run the race that is set before me." Yes, Somebody is watching. It is God.
