To Train or Not to Train, That is the Question

After 3 weeks of diminished training and focus, I set out yesterday with a resolve to begin more purposeful training. It was like kicking a wasp nest. "The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune" seemed to rise to the occasion to beat back my hope. It wasn't a perfect day but it was a day I did not give in and that was a small victory in itself. I pray today for another small victory.

"Society everywhere is in conspiracy against the manhood of its members." Emerson

Singing My Song

Perhaps, I started back training too heavily from convalesence following rotator cuff surgery. For the last three days, I have been burned out and burned up. Today, I finally have the energy in my legs again. But, more importanly: I finally have the will and the "want to." Yesterday, I could not imagine finishing an olympic distance triathlon. The birds are really singing out there this morning urging me to add my own song of life into the world.

Caught From Behind

Coming home from swimming 2000 yards it all caught up with me. I knew I had been overdoing it and I knew that like a slower runner in the lead, that sooner or later I would get caught from behind.

Fatigue is systemic. As the expression goes, "I am poured out like water." It is a "bone marrow' tired that I just can't seem to push through today. So today, I must confess to my humanity, my vulnerabilities and get some rest.

It is these times that give the good training days a richer meaning and a greater appreciation. It is the depth of the valleys that make climbing the mountains the exhilarating experience I seek. Thank God for the whole experience.

Pool Inspiration

Yesterday as I entered the pool area of the gym, I saw a woman swimming laps. What great form she had. She did some laps using the breast stroke, then some with the back stroke and moved so smoothly through the water. Her stroke cadence seemed especially high and I thought that she wouldn't last long going like that.

However, even after I had swam 800 yards the lady was still at it, never backing off a bit from that cadence. What an athlete I thought! How does she do that? She lapped me so many times I stopped trying to keep up. I had almost swam a mile when she finally got out of the pool. What an inspiration!

Most of the time I am the best swimmer in that particular pool-not because I am all that good- and it is me lapping the others. A lot of the usual swimmers are there just doing their best to muddle through for the exercise. No disrespect to these swimmers but next to them, I might seem a pretty good swimmer- big fish; little pond. It might seem a bit strange but it was so good to be humbled a bit; to know, to fully realize the capacity for performance that is there and to be provided a model of athleticism to be inspired and motivated from. No surprise then that this day my cadence went up considerably and I swam a half mile more than I had planned on.

Positive Deception

Windy bike ride yesterday but I seemed to be going really well. In fact, my speed was really exceptional even going into the wind. Then I remembered that the battery in my bike computer had just been changed and perhaps it had defaulted to measuring speed in KMs? Sure enough. But, the strength of spirit instilled by this positive deception was still with me. I had begun to believe something greater about myself.

It was a reminder, yet again, that the quality of our performance, the quality of our lives is determined pretty much by what we believe is possible and what we believe about ourselves.

Perhaps the mistake in measurement on my bike computer was not a mistake at all but a vision of the possibilities God has invested in me?

Seeing the End from the Beginning

Last night I signed up for the half ironman. It is on. No more "maybes" and no more being tentative. If integrity is the willingness to keep promises, then so to the promises we make to ourselves. A financial commitment is a notary seal for me. The deal is done and now to the business of staying focused, committed,staying healthy, motivated. The goal is to find myself at dawn on the edge of Walter Long Lake on October 17th, fit mentally, physically and most of all spiritually for the day I have ventured for.

"Only that day dawns but to which we are truly awake." Henry David Thoreau

Overcoming the Insects

When warm weather comes and I turn my porch light on at night, it is not long before the place is full of insects swarming around. Starting over, turning on my light seems to draw out all the bugs that hinder the journey. As I seem to get stronger and more focused, the more demanding the other things in life that I have to attend seem to become. Perhaps, if I were to just live life in a low hum and not make noise or challenge things would go more smoothly?

However, as someone has said, "If it were easy, everybody would be doing it." The event begins when we declare to go to one. All the land mines thrown in our path are part of the process, part of the course, part of our journey. In overcoming them, they will become part of that ultimate joy at the finish line.